Fannie to fannies: The interviews, number 5, STEPHEN BEDDOWS (AC Milan)

Good afternoon guys and she is back!. Fannie Licker has returned and she is bigger and better (her words not mine although bigger is a good word to use) than before. An unfortunate incident, involving her now ex-boyfriend, left her depressed and she thought about packing it all in before finally getting her act together and deciding to come back. She is not quite the same as she was before as the depression made her go on the infamous seafood diet but I will let her tell you about that as it’s not really my place. So, let’s not waste any more time and get this, the fifth, interview underway. I give you ……… Fannie Licker!!!!!

Hi guys, I am back!! I may be a teensy weensy bit bigger than before but I am still the same girl inside. I am on the way back to the way I used to be after the unfortunate incident with my boyfriend. To put it bluntly, he was too weird with the stuff he wanted to do. I wasn’t going to say anything about it but what the hell. He knew I would do anything for him so, you know the cardboard tubes you get? The one that you are left with when the tin foil runs out? Well, he wanted me to stick that up his bum. OMG was all I could think of at the time but I eventually relented and done as he wished. He then, and this is the bit that upsets me, wanted me to put Snowball, my pet hamster, down the tube and into his bum. What a weirdo!! Poor Snowball never had a chance. Down he went inside the tube but disaster struck when my boyfriend, unexpectedly let off a huge fart. Poor Snowball was fired out that tube like a cannonball and splatted against the wall. I was terribly upset. That was the end of Snowball and also the end of my boyfriend, who I told to leave. Dumped, and I never want to see him ever again. The loss of Snowball put me into depression and I couldn’t stop eating as my picture below shows but I have now got over it with lots of help from my doctor and I am on my way back to my former self.

Anyway, I am glad to get that off my chest and now it is time to introduce you to today’s Top100 manager. This guy has done so much to help the Top100 be the success it is and although it looks like his time in Division 1 is over, he is still very popular with at least another 3 managers, who asked not to be named. I give you the manager of Italian minnows AC Milan, Mr Stephen Beddows!!

Welcome Stephen, the man the fans love to hate, and let’s get started with your personal profile.

STEPHEN BEDDOWS – PERSONAL PROFILE


Full Name:  Stephen Beddows
Born: 26/12/1984
Height: 5’11’
Nickname: Beddows
Favourite Sports teams: Man Utd, Burton Albion, ENGLAND!
Favourite food: Steak
Favourite drink: Beer
Favourite band/singer: don’t really have one
Favourite all time song: too many to name
Favourite Colour: red
Favourite animal: dogs and tigers
Favourite film: too many to name
Your Car: Vauxhall corsa
Best Friend: my daughter

What phone do you have: Nokia Lumia 640
Best sport to watch: football… (rugby, cricket and tennis IF England are playing Or that Jock Murray)
What scares you most: not being able to pay my bills
Phone, iPad or laptop to play SM: laptop and phone
Embarrassing moment: Dunno
Ever won anything on the lottery: refuse to answer this one
If you could have any job in the world what would it be: Teach English to footballers at a foreign professional club
Who would you most like to meet (dead or alive): I like my family history and my gg grandfather fascinates me, born in Athol Street in 1875, in Liverpool, he had a very interesting life.
If you could attend any sporting event in the world what would it be: World Cup Final all day long 

Thanks for that Stephen, a couple of abstentions there but that is your right. Let’s move on to the interview and a chance for you to put forward your views to the AC Milan fans.

FL:  Stephen, it’s been quite a season for you with poor form, controversy and criticism being just some of the problems for the team. What has changed from last season that has seen Milan now favourites for relegation?

SB:  Well I joined mid-season last season and just maintained the status-quo to be honest. This season has been a struggle as I think I have been too reluctant in some parts to make the necessary changes in the transfer market etc which is something I have done a little, but perhaps not enough. I also didn’t dedicate as much time as I should have tactically to studying the opposition but hopefully since the Lyon win things have begun to change, despite two narrow defeats away to both Atletico and Juve.

FL:  The defence in particular have performed way below expectations. Is there a lack of leadership at the back and is that your responsibility and something that you have failed with?

 

FL:  The final question is standard for all managers. If you could manage any club in the Top 100 who would it be?