Top100 Gossip Edition 3

Doug Earle of Espanyol is keen to move on some underperforming youth players. As much as he tried to train them to steal from tourists in Barcelona city centre, they kept failing miserably as they were distracted by the Tibidabo Amusement Park. Ntim, Zejnullahu, Spierings, Gonzalez and Labra are thought to be the first to leave after they spent a full morning on the Waltzers.

In a throwback to the Didier Drogba days, Villa manager Rahul is attempting to recreate that saga again, this time with Portuguese striker Eder. Eder is thought to be annoyed at Rahul’s insistence on making him leave the club after finally getting to grips with the local past time of Karaoke.
Hertha BSC are willing to trade Vladimir Darida for an 88 rated CM and 87 rated CB, or 1 great part ex plus cash. Valentin Stocker remains on the transfer list and is available for part ex plus cash, but not for rubbish older players, as the club make a push to move on from mid table mediocrity.
Having moved on some youth players who never stopped playing on their iPhones long enough to realise a match was underway, Sao Paolo are looking to strengthen their midfield with a bid for Michael Bradley. Rumours abound however, that manager Nick Wheels has made the bid in local currency, 11,000 spoons, and 
It’s a revolving door in Liverpool this morning, Gino Kinnear has agreed to sell Josh McEachran to Brentford for £3m after failing to adapt to not winning trophies with the correct technique, whilst Junior Fernandes has been told to find a new club after falling to 17th in the striker pecking order, just behind Khedira’s mum. Caktas may also leave the club after falling out with youth team captain Castagne. One player not leaving Anfield however is Sofiane Feghouli, he has been the subject of a bid from Sevilla that is likely to be rejected.
Alex McLean at Olympiakos is thought to be chasing an aging right back in Vanderlei Jean, however, the proposed 2 for 1 offer is unlikely to go  through due to the large squad already at Villarreal. In another 2 for 1 deal, McLean is looking for a particular set of skills, skills that have been acquired over a very long career, skills that make his Olympiakos side a nightmare for teams like yours… he’d like to sign a CM, AM of F (C) for 2 of Conca, Nilmar and Diego.
Manolo Gabbiadini’s transfer ban is due to end on Sunday, and Sampdoria are rumoured to be sniffing around. In true Italian style, Marco De Angelis is expected to make Frank Hirst an offer he can’t refuse… Should a move go through it’s expected that an investigation will be launched to identify if any Mafia persuasion has been involved, and then the subsequent investigation is expected to be cancelled and forgotten about after the lead investigator goes on an extended fishing trip, never to return.
Greg Bilboa has stolen a march on Borussia Monchengladbach and Chievo Verona by agreeing a £4million fee for Yura Movsisyan of Tom Tomsk. Greg will be hoping he scores plenty of goals goals at Malaga Malaga. Best I could think of, sorry I’ve let you down gents…
Down in Verona town, Chievo’s Argentinian striker Ezequiel Ponce has been seen dining with both Juventus and Levante, it’s thought he ordered a nice salad, avoided the bread and dessert, whilst sipping a nice glass of Rose wine. Like name like nature I suppose.
And finally, in managerial gossip, it’s been reported by sources within WWE that Stephen Beddows, Tom Parfitt and PMW will be fighting it out in the ring to settle their differences once and for all. Secret training footage has shown each of the coaches working on their new patented finishing moves, the Balotelli Bomb, the Facial Follicle Fling and the Marshmallow Mangle. It remains to be seen when the fight will take place, and who will come out on top in the mind games.

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