MCLEAN IN DREAM JOB AT CITY

It was smiles all round in the McLean household when, after leading Inter to a 3rd consecutive play

off, Khaldoon Al Mubarek pleaded with the wily Scot to take over the reigns at top flight outfit 

Manchester City, with a remit to overhaul the squad and keep the side at the top table.

A lifelong City fan himself, McLean relished the opportunity of a lifetime and gladly accepted.

The Light Blues had just come off the back of a wonderful season from ex-City boss Paddy d. A top 6 finish in his final season would be hard to beat. McLean knew that, despite being where he wanted to be, he would have to pull out all the stops to even match that achievement.

On the first day at the office McLean made a cold hard appraisal of the squad. The 1st team was as

solid as you could get, with the likes of Ibra, Laca, Robben, Gundi and Luis being the stand outs.

Yet outside this majestic XI the squad was as thin as a Kenyan marathon runners cock. It was also

clear that the likes of Ibra, Robben and Ribery would need to be moved on sooner than later and that

the dynamism of youth was severely lacking. 

Some difficult choices needed to be made. McLean bit his lip and went for it.

McLean gathered his team together and laid everything out for them. ‘You’ve had a terrific season lads and you’ve been, all of you, an absolute credit to the club’, he said. ‘But the way things stand

in terms of the quality of our squad depth and Academy hopefuls, things are not sustainable’, he reasoned. There was a hush around the training ground as the seniors in the squad knew what was coming next. ‘We need to bring in new, exciting young talent, but to do that I’m going to have to let some of you go’, he went on, ‘I’ve already spoken to those concerned and they have accepted this need for the good of the club, so I want you all to give a big hand to Laca and Mertens for all that they have done to further the ambition of this club, thank you lads and good luck’! A massive cheer went up from the lads. 

McLean was then seen to gather Ibra, Robben and Ribery together. What was said was anybody’s guess, but all three nodded in agreement with the gaffers words, and they left with serious, but determined looks on their faces.

True to his word McLean worked all his contacts in an

effort to find suitable quality replacements for the

outstanding Laca and Mertens. A tip off led him to

Monaco and some hard bargaining resulted in Laca

signing for the French principality and coming the other

way would be young Spanish star Mikel Oyarzabel, 19 yr

old Argie whizz kid Maxi Romero and ex- Madrid front

man Mariano Diaz.

The Mertens move was straightforward as you like.

Said McLean, ‘Chelsea registered an interest in the lad 

and straightaway offered both Bentancur and Perreiro.

I was absolutely thrilled to get both these young talents,

but especially Bentancur – that kid is as cold as ice and

as smooth as silk’. McLean also brought in veterans Alves

and Vucinic for some squad players, reasoning that their

experience could prove invaluable throughout the season. 

The City boss then set about organizing some friendlies ahead of the league opener away to Italian

giants Juventus. It was here, during friendlies and in the training ground, that McLean made clear to his charges that intelligence, hard work, will power, courage and tactical flexibility would see the

team through the season. City travelled to Turin with high hopes and good spirits.

They were thrashed 3-0.

But Mclean was unbowed in his methods and asked the players to trust him. They responded with a tenacious performance against German giants Bayern Munich and earned a creditable 1-1 draw at the

Etihad. The following week saw City claim their first win of the season with a 2-1 home victory over

Gladbach. A surprise defeat to Wolfsburg followed by a dispiriting loss to PSG meant City faced their crosstown rivals in the first derby of the season with just 4 pts from 4 games. McLean brought out the Solis Swiss Perfection hairdryer (£91.50 rrp) and gave the players a full blast. City ran out 2-1 winners at Old Trafford with goals from Ibra and Otamendi. This was a pivotal result that saw the Light blues really push on with 10 matches undefeated in all contests.

By the time City’s amazing run had come to an end at Arsenal, McLean had allowed star man Ibra to leave for Milan. McLean felt that even though he had bagged 5 in 11 that the time was right to move him on. Rumours in the tabloids had suggested that Ibra’s ‘Man bun’ had begun to be a negative presence in the dressing room.There was even suggestions that it had been sneaking into Robben’s locker and leaving ‘deposits’. McLean batted away these tabloid tattles with customary aplomb, and welcomed young PSV midfielder Ramselaar into the ranks.

Soon to follow out the door was Oyarzabel, to be replaced with

PSV sensation Steven Bergwijn and Marseille’s French u21

international Maxime Lopez. With Robben playing up top City

went on another streak of 12 matches without a loss in all comps. The team were flying and Robben positively thrived in

his new position as the no.9. Safety seemed assured and even Ribery cracked a grin that aggravated his herpes for a week. 



  

And then it all fell apart like Duncan from next door boasting

that he was a ‘wiz sparky’ and would sort out your tv connection

problems only to find out that changing from one channel to

another required you modulating your oven by changing the

degree of heat, such that you could be heard calling out ‘ babe

Match Of The Day is on 180 degrees, be a doll will you’? Much

to the confusion of neighbours. City went fully 7 matches with

not a sniff of victory, ended only by the much fan fared and  

enormous thrashing of Juve, with the team chomping at the

bit for revenge. The match highlights were shown first on Match

Of The Day on channel 180 degrees.  Yet still consistency was

as hard to find as a solid display of attacking football at Turf Moor.   

Following a 3-1 beating by Real Madrid McLean was absolutely livid with his players. He reasoned that the ‘Hairdryer’ treatment needed upscaling. He brought in the Karcher AB20 (£627.99 rrt). There

was no coming back with that punishment. The players either took it or walked. Fortunately these lads, this little band of merry men, we few, we happy few, we band of brothers fought as one. And

fight we did. It was another 11 match winning spree that took us up to the dizzy heights of 5th and a place in he Europa Cup semis. Brilliant! 

At the end of the run , with City lying 5th and a spot in the Europa League final almost assured, that McLean sought to auction of the likes of Robben, Ribery and Gundi ahead of the new season – with some success.

Following the victory over Sparta in the Europa League semi’s first leg and an incredible 12 match unbeaten run in all comps, and a club record 8 wins in a row, McLean rang the changes.

Out was Ribery. Out was Robben.  Out was Gundi. They called it the Europa League massacre.

Fans were adamant that this amounted to a sell off of City’s best players. McLean was hurt by these accusations but felt the fans had a point. But what could he do?

Pre-season Robben was sold for Milenkovic and Berghuis. McLean said of the deal, ‘ It is a wonder I am able to persuade such quality to come to the Etihad. I am thrilled’. Ribery will no longer play for City. He is off to Birmingham. He doesn’t deserve this, but needs must.

The biggest pre-season deal will see Gundi move to Monaco in exchange for Traore and Vrsaljko. a magnificent deal.

City have, bit by bit, sold off their very best players. It is unrealistic to expect City to challenge for major honours, or even to remain in the top division. From McLean , ‘ I have deliberately set out to invigorate the squad. I have done that. I was tasked with bringing in young blood. I have done that. I was asked to maintain position. I have done that. If the powers that be feel I am not right for the job, then fair enough. All I can say is my record speaks for itself.’  

‘Next season will be the biggest challenge of my career as a manager. I may have overreached this season, but I am determined, willful and scarily hard working. I will give my best to see this team stay in and then thrive. I will it.’

And there you have it. McLean – legend.